Our kickflips light up your life Bertie is Chief of Operations Problem solvers. No crumbs left. Big problems. Small problems. All problems. FloppyCougar Industries Our kickflips light up your life Bertie is Chief of Operations Problem solvers. No crumbs left. Big problems. Small problems. All problems. FloppyCougar Industries
FloppyCougar Industries

Problem
Solvers.
No Crumbs Left.

We help people solve problems — big or small, simple or complex. With creative, lateral thinking explained in a way anyone can understand. And we have a blast doing it.

FloppyCougar Logo — Bertie in a blazer with a briefcase
Our kickflips light up your life.
🐾 Bertie's Current Status
Fully Flopped — Post-Engagement Debrief "She's seen it. She's unbothered. It's fine."
Bertie — CEO Energy
CEO Energy Full chaos energy — she owns every room
Bertie — Boardroom
Boardroom "I've seen things"
Bertie — Ready to Consult
Ready to Consult The patient listener
Bertie — Post-Engagement Debrief
Post-Engagement Debrief Fully flopped
The Analogy Archive

Tap for an Unsolicited Dose of Wisdom

"If you're going to herd cats, bring lots of cucumbers."

About having the right unexpected tool for a chaotic situation. Not brute force — the lateral solution.

What We Do

Analytically unusual.
Explained simply.

Most consultants either think differently OR explain things clearly. Sean does both. That combination is the product. Every consultancy claims they solve problems. FloppyCougar is the only one promising a genuinely good time.

The brand started as an inside joke. A domain name. A meme. Then a Vizsla named Bertie became the Floppy Cougar. The joke became the brand. The brand became real.

High Touch

Video or in-person. Back and forth. The full conversation. The ideal engagement.

Low Touch

Async text. A form submission, a written response, a template. Still no crumbs.

Website Prototypes

Got a business with no web presence, a dead site, or an idea on a napkin? We build functioning prototypes fast — from photos, sketches, or pure description. You'll have something real to react to before most agencies finish their intake form.

The Table

Helped a friend design and visualize a custom table from scratch. An abstract idea became something real enough to commit to and build.

Creative Problem Solving

The Avengers Loan Matrix

Built an Avengers-themed borrower analyzer in Excel for loan approvals. It became the most-used tool in the office. The fun wasn't decoration — the fun was the mechanism that made people actually use it.

Operations & Systems

The Stack Deli

Built a fully functioning website prototype — sticky nav, working cart, full menu — from a single photo of an old paper menu. Start to finish. No brief, no brand guide, no existing digital presence. Just a picture and a problem.

Web Prototype — View Live ↗

Bertie's
Project Mood Board

Live status — updated by Sean manually. Bertie has final approval.

🎬 Film
BERT

Post-apocalyptic survival where the threat is invisible to humans but detectable by dogs. The people who make it aren't the toughest — they're the ones dogs chose to trust.

🐾 Zoomies — "She's obsessed. Full send. Do not interrupt."
🐟 Film
THE TANK

Alien abduction told through the fish bowl. Humans are fish. Planets are tanks. Death is as meaningful to aliens as flushing a fish.

👀 Ears Up — "She noticed. She's watching. Could be something."
🌿 Game
CANOPY

You ARE the plant. A distributed intelligence that thinks in seasons not seconds. Every other strategy game is about force. This one is about patience.

🏆 CEO Mode — "She has claimed this project. Nonnegotiable."
📱 Dissected — First Entry
DATA BRICKS

Every phone IS a brick. The story of how they're made — told on a phone, consumed on a phone, shared on a phone, by people who immediately scroll to the next thing.

😵 Staring at the wall — "She believes in it. It's being difficult right now."
🎙️ Podcast
I Have an Analogy for That

Sean deep dives. Grant reads two sentences. Sean coins the analogy. Grant delivers it wrong. Preparation meets beautiful obliviousness. The contrast IS the comedy.

🐾 Zoomies — "She's obsessed. Full send."
🔬 Coming Soon
The Lab

Creative projects in development. Films, games, big ideas. Things that are being difficult right now but Bertie believes in them.

🛋️ Flopped — "She's seen it. She's unbothered. It's fine."
Get Help

Drop Your Problem Here

Personal, professional, big, small, half-formed, or fully baked. We read everything. We respond to everything. And if it needs a deeper conversation, we'll set that up too.


Messy is fine. We like messy.